Saturday, December 10, 2005


Friday I was well prepared for poker. I wore my patented Boston Red Sox World Champions hooded sweatshirt to work with a pair of jeans, and made it to the club in record time: just after 4:30 pm. Alas, I was first up for a seat in the must move game! Holy fuck - who are these delinquents - don't they have jobs?

At least I didn't lose my seat to H0nus, who'd earlier threatened to beat me there and take the final seat. Joke's on you sucka: H0nus arrives 40 minutes later, and finds the list 3 deep, but gets to watch me rake this nice pot:

I'm in the BB with aces. Kenny straddles for $5 UTG ($1-$2 blinds, $5 straddle.) Two limpers, and then Paul moves all in for $85. Rene, a player I've never seen, smooth calls the $85 in the cutoff, and it's folded to me. I ponder my options, and decide to raise roughly the size of the pot: I make it $300 to go. All fold to Rene, and he thinks for 20 seconds before moving all in, for just under $500 total, which is what I have. I call of course, and his QQ cannot catch up. I never see Paul's hand.

On the next hand, I find 3-3 in the SB, and fail to liquidate Ivan after I call his pre-flop raise and see the flop come Q-J-3. I bet out $20, into a $60 3-way pot, and the player in the middle mucks. Ivan makes it $60 to go, and I come over the top all-in. Ivan only had about $140 left, and he was steaming, so I thought I'd get him here with any piece of the flop, but he managed to muck his Q-8.

An orbit later, Ivan made it $10 to go in early position, and I called 2 to the right of the button with 5-7 offsuit. Ivan is now sitting on a fresh $500 stack, and the button has a slightly smaller stack when he calls as well.

The flop comes down: 5-5-7, with a two flush. Yeah baby - I'm a card rack, but getting hit with the deck is only half the battle: you still have to get your opponent's stack... Ivan checks to me, and I bet out $20, into a $35 pot. The button announces "raise" and makes it $65 to go. Ivan folds, and it's back to me. I cut some chips and give him an eye before smooth calling. The turn is an offsuit 6, and I check to the raiser. This guys is a player I've only seen once before: he's somewhat new to the game, but not a complete fool. He hems and haws, and finally bets $150. I again look him over, and calmly push out a stack of green $25 chips, raising him all-in. He has about $210 left.

Now, this guy is shaking his head, motioning like he's going to fold, so I execute the trademark Kid Dynamite fish-catching move: I slide my hand out toward the dealer, holding it in my right hand, like I'm just waiting for him to muck so I can rake the pot. He seems to perk up. I deftly drop three white $1 chips onto my cards, which I'm still holding, as a pre-mature dealer tip.

My opponent shakes his head, and can't bring himself to muck - he finally calls, and I calmly withdraw my cards back toward me, remove my pre-mature tip, and flip over my fives full. He is speechless, as the Queen on the river doesn't help his pocket 8's, and I rake another sizable pot. He makes a trip to the ATM, and returns to question his play. I assure him it was a mandatory call with 8's, as he had to expect that he had straight outs as well. Whatever... Suck it.

The rest of the session was uneventful: I managed to pick up AA again in the BB, but got no action after I raised to $20 following 4 limpers.

We had one hilarious "over your head" moment after an improbable series of events in this hand: Joe ends up mucking an ass-straight face up with a final board of K-Q-J-T-x. He shows a nine after his opponent bets. Joe jokes "I'm too tight," and Eddie, the dealer, remarks, "Tighter than a nun's ass." Now, Eddie has women sitting on both sides of him in the 1 and 10 seats, so I sarcastically whistle, as if to say "Whoa, hold up."

Eddie looks at me and says sarcastically, "What? You ever had a nun?" The blonde in the 10 seats pipes in: "I had a nine!" and Eddie and I explode in laughter, as she completely missed the dialogue, and was still focused on the hand. Good times.

I finished the session +$1291, making up for my abomination from last Monday, and also ending my streak of "consecutive sessions getting stacked while holding A-Q."

In other news, I read a Party Poker research report from a major brokerage house which stated that Party makes upwards of $700k per day from their "casino" games; ie: Blackjack. More interestingly, Party claims that 40% of their users play both casino games and poker! They are planning to introduce 2 more casino games in the next quarter: widely believe to be roulette and... ?

Mrs. Dynamite and I are going to visit a Brussels Griffon breeder Sunday morning: if all goes well, we'll be puppy parents in about 5 weeks!

until next time,

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