Sunday, November 26, 2006

Crown Their Ass!

I'm not big on going to a bar to watch football: I'd almost always prefer to watch it from the confines of my own couch. However, being located in NYC, with the Giants playing Sunday at 4pm, I was part of one of two metropolitan markets in the country whose FOX 4pm game was Giants @ Tennessee rather than Bears @ Patriots. Thus, me and Scooter headed over to Barrow Street to watch the carnage, as the Patriots showed the Bears what happens when you go up against a real opponent.
I had previously gone on record to Dirty Dave with my guaranteed 10 star parlay of the year (which, since I have quit betting, is COMPLETELY assured of success): NE - 3, Under 37.5, and Rex Grossman over 1.5 Interceptions. Of course, all three legs came through with ease, as the 17-13 final score was never in doubt.
Did you see Junior Seau break his arm in the first half? Holy shit - this was a play so ugly that you won't see a replay, because they don't show replays of disturbing shit like this: Seau fell on his own arm, which was levered over a running back's leg - and broke his own forearm like a twig. He grabbed it, and the camera zoomed in to see it dangling like a limp wrist - only it wasn't his wrist, it was 6 inches higher. Disturbing, and possible a career ender for Seau.
The play of the game was the not-so-fleet-footed Tom Brady scrambling for a 4th quarter first down, as he put a shake-and-bake move on the lethal Brian Urlacher. Then Brady got in his face and talked shit to him - awesome stuff.
And how about the Giants-Titans game?!?! Talk about muther-fuckin SIGMAs!!!!! The Giants jumped out to a 21-0 first half lead, which is how it stayed until the 4th quarter, when Tennessee suddenly clawed their way back into the game with 2 TD's. Then, with 4th and 10 on his own 15 yard line or so, Vince Young was wrapped up by Giant's rookie Mathias Kiwanuka for a game ending sack - but there was one problem - Kiwanuka let Young go without a whistle! Young scrambled for a first down, and Tennessee scored an inevitable touchdown of destiny to tie the game. Then, Eli Manning threw an interception at midfield with less than a minute left, Tennessee ran a few plays and drilled a game winning 49 yard field goal. Sigmalicious.
Mrs. Dynamite joined us for the final quarter of the Patriots game, and got me all aroused when she uttered this simple inquiry: "Can't you arb the point spreads of the game?" Oooh baby... Bringing together the concepts of arbitrage and sports betting - THAT'S my GIRL!!!
"Elaborate," I urged her, wanting to see what she was thinking of.
"Well, if the line was New England -3, and now it's New England - 4.5, couldn't you bet both sides of it and clean up?" My baby was looking for a middle! I'm so proud.
I realized that the pro sports bettors must have absolutely CRUSHED this game, as a middle like this covering two key numbers (3 and 4) with two big defensively oriented teams is a phenomenal play. I explained to her that you have to pay a 10% vig, so you'd be betting $1000 on each side of the game, which ensures a $100 loss, with a chance to win $2000. 20-1 odds on a NE-CHI 3 or 4 point NE win is probably a very nice price. And Mrs. Dynamite had it the whole fucking time.
until next time,

1 comment:

Huge Junk said...

I won't be in Vegas that weekend due to plans I'd be a dick to break. I will, however, be in Connecticut from the January 27th through February 9th, or some such dates. I'll have one free weekend to head into the NY area. Perhaps time can be found to throw a few beers back.